pathetic politics, Bush still not working, and "so that's what 'born-again' means"...

well...just when you thought politics in this country could not fall any lower...just when you thought painful attack ads paid for by insanely rich people that will win either way went too far...just when you became physically ill at the blatant race baiting and lying of certain campaigners (cough, cough, mostly republicans, cough, cough)...here comes the Karl Rove machine to bring shameful politics to a whole nother level. the republican party has now taken to crank calls...either posing as pollsters before inundating the poor old lady on the other end of the line with some fox-news-worthy slander or posing as the democratic candidate and harrassing voters in an attempt to piss them off enough to stay home. so there you have it...this is what republican conservatism stands for...steal from the poor and give to the rich, aggressive war, reversing social justice, racism, xenophobia, homophobia, and childish pranks. grand old party indeed...if lincoln hadn't already been shot in the head, he would do it himself with what you have done to the ideals he stood for.

speaking off...bush is still taking time away from the office to campaign for the "red" folks in this country. notice he is staying away from anywhere that the republican actually needs the help...perhaps it has something to do with his being the worst. president. ever. or perhaps it is just because in those states they couldn't find a stadium full of white elites to cheer a grown ass man playing cowboy...seriously, when was the last time you saw a person at one of his rallies that wasn't pale? or whose shoes had holes? wonder what the crowd would look like if they truly opened it up to the general public...and what their reaction would be. (well, no, I really don't wonder...the man would be shocked to learn everyone thinks he is a prick). seriously...what the fuck is with an elected leader who is supposed to represent the american people being so inaccessable to the american people?

I've struggled with what exactly "born-again" means...until last week when the good Rev. Ted Haggard, the almighty leader of evangelicals in America, had the courtesy to fill me in. apparently to be "born-again" requires seriously fucked up mind altering substances combined with poking a member of the same sex. the best I can figure, the methamphetamine, also known by its biblical name of "ice", provides you with the necessary will-power to join with your male prostitute in searching the most inner depths of your "soul"...the process seems to entail an overpowering sense of joy throughout your entire body accompanied by convulsions as the spirit of the lord engulfs you and your speaking in tongues (often confused with ape-like grunting and phrases such as "put it in my pooper"). if performed correctly, the seed of the spirit will flow from your partner deep within you.

or...if you are a coward...you can just throw the meth away.