dismantling America, the naked chief, revenge killing presidents, and why Obama will win...

It has been some time since anyone in the Bush Administration officially came out and declared all that is right and good and human with the American justice system to be outdated relics left over from a time when freedom was actually important (you know, that time before 3,000 people were killed in an act of mass murder...to put that in perspective, that many civilians are dying monthly in Iraq). So, to remind us just how incredibly un-American Bush and his comrades (subtle hint of authoritarian overstepping intended) are, the Pentagon put together a "how to" book on killing innocents through kangaroo court proceedings. And thank god for that, because for awhile now I have been worried that this nation might actually avoid becoming the largest Banana Republic the world has ever seen...phew [insert wipe of brow here].

Apparently it will be too difficult to actually have to prove a case with reliable evidence against suspected terrorists (and perhaps that is why, when confronted with the option of conducting a serious trial in tune with American notions of fundamental fairness the Administration has consistently decided to simply release "the worst of the worst"). Thus, we now have the Pentagon's "how to conduct a kangaroo court" which sets forth rules that will allow the government to infringe on the inalienable right of life (i.e. state sanctioned murder) by using the most unreliable evidence we know of...hearsay and that got from torture. I have gotten an express preview of the trial of the future...and here is an excerpt from the transcript...

Prosecutor: Could you tell the court your name?
Witness: Joe Confidential Informant.
Prosecutor: And how do you know the dead man walking - er defendant?
Witness: I served him lunch at a strip club five years ago in Afghanistan.
Prosecutor: And what did he tell you on that day in a strip club five years ago when it was too dark to recognize him and you were high on opiates?
Witness: He said 'death to America. I am going to insurge against America.'
Prosecutor: No further questions....

Prosecutor: And while you were driving nails through his testicles and breaking his bones, beginning with his toes and moving your way up his body, what did he tell you?
Interrogator: Well, to be fair, first we left him in a 2 foot by 2 foot room for two weeks while dousing him with freezing water in between forcing him to commit sexual acts with a marmot and repeatedly bringing him to the edge of death through drowning along with the standard hourly beatings and sleep deprivation...but through all of that he maintained he was a British citizen in the region for a wedding, so we had to get serious. But while his testicles were being nailed to the wall, and by the time we had worked our way up to snap his third rib he finally agreed to put his name on this piece of paper that indicates he was insurging against America.
Prosecutor: No further questions.

"Judge": I'm really not sure why we bothered to go through all of that...I mean, that is 20 minutes of my life I will never get back, and we all knew I am just supposed to say "guilty" and "death" here...so why did we waste the time? Anyways...guilty. Now you die.


So there you have it. Thank god for American style freedom...

The president recently commented on Saddam's execution by saying it had the feel of a "revenge killing." Well, no shit Mr. President, who would've thought that a sectarian leader who brutalized the other side would then be executed in a vengeful manner when the tables had turned? Of course, he then explained that he is not that type of man...the revenge killing type. I guess he temporarily forgot that he has signed more death warrants (by a rather large margin) than anyone else in the country. Or maybe he is right, maybe killing a black or latino who may or may not be the perpetrator of a crime against some white folk isn't really "revenge."

And it gets better, he admitted that while he watched the beginning part of the video from the execution, he did not see the floor fall away and Saddam plunge to his death. Maybe it is just me, but if someone is going to order that a couple hundred people be put to death in the state he runs, shouldn't he at least have the balls to watch an execution, just once, on video?

The Ogala Sioux have knocked yet another leg out from under the wealthy suburban white folk that are in love with Chief Illiniwek...they want the regalia the Chief wears back. So now that the one tribe that seemed to back the Chief is off-board, the argument basically comes down to this..."I don't see the Illiniwek complaining." Of course, that might just be due to the little genocide we like to ignore. Now, I used to argue in favor of the Chief, and god knows I am obsessed with my school...but at some point, you need to just admit that you are an asshole and give it up...

Barack Obama will be the next president of the United States (assuming Bush is not impeached, which he should be). Aside from being the ideal candidate for this point in American history, ironically, it will be racism that propels this man to the White House. See, every time someone asks the question "but is America ready to elect a black president?" it makes a slew of people that much more devoted to show that this country has moved beyond its shameful past (which it hasn't). For every bigoted asshole that pipes up, there will be many pushed to vote in a manner to stick it up the bigoted asshole's ass...plus, don't discount the closeted bigoted asshole vote which will likely view a vote for Obama as the ultimate "one of my best friends is black" retort.

the son of Uncle Sam smiles and shakes my hand...shakes me down and tells me that he wants to be my friend...